Penultimate.

Lately, everything seems to be prefixed by "last."

Today, we completed our "last" set of full block days in high school, on the "last" Friday. It was also Mrs. Durham's "last" day at Timpview and our "last" day of real classwork.

It was a relaxed, content school day, accompanied by the pretty violin music my friend spent all day playing in the journalism lab (trying to make up practice hours for orchestra) and accented by a delicious carrot cake, the Friendship's tradition for celebrating the last real school lunch (we'll go to Los Hermanos, the site of our other "last" lunch tradition, on Tuesday).

I wish more high school days were like this one- quite simply, everyone just seems happy to know each other, happy to be around each other for what might be the last time. In completion, we're all friendly and considerate; sure of ourselves and our diverse, immediate futures, all competitions in popularity, academics and beauty have faded in favor of a peaceful resolution. All pressure is off; for once, it's enough just to be part of our graduating class, together in positive direction and overwhelmed by the immensity of it all. We stand in consensual awe at the edge of an inscrutable threshold, knowing that in six days we will fall, absolutely alone.
This is the calm before the storm. This is the deep breath before the plunge. This is the last real day before graduation.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS HAPPENING.
I'M WRITING IN GRADUATION CLICHES!?!?
WORSE: I MEAN THEM.

I think I've let my emotional connections hypertrophy into flesh-and-blood extensions of me, and let me tell you, tearing them is really going to hurt. I don't know how I'll deal with never seeing anyone I know and like here ever again. I never knew I was this attached until now.

Loss is painful. What's worse is knowing it's coming.
MY PSYCHE NEEDS A LIDOCAINE INJECTION, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

...By the way: δ+ for today. :-)