Self-doubt.

Science is accountability.
It is precision and accuracy, exact mass and perfect notation.
It is verifiable, repeatable, quantifiable, amoral.
Its shadow falls, cold and majestic, over me, and I look up in reverent awe, but can't resist a shudder.

I am human.
I am shaky and capable of forgetting.
I have the capacity to misinterpret, to cause irreversible damage.
I am fluid and imperfect, more soul than machine, as much as I don't like to admit it.

I am trying.
I am learning.

But I am scared I'll accidentally knock over the perfect scales, disrupting the balance, and all the hard-earned, ivory marbles of knowledge will clatter to the floor, scattering every which way and leaving me standing alone to blame: conspicuous, clumsy, and contrite.

What if I ruin everything?
Still, I guess fear is better than complacency.